I am occassionaly asked to lead a memorial service for someone I have never met. I am glad to do it because I feel it is important to connect to non churched folks and regular folks who have no church connections, and I also believe I can do the service with compassion and connection. You learn so much about someone from just listening to the family and responding to their wishes.
In this case the kids did the sharing of key moments of their Dad's life and it was very inspiring to see such a close and loving and happy family. He worked hard, and had two passions he pursued besides family....golf and piano, including classical piano, at which he excelled. It was very affirming and seeing how many friends came to pay respects I was quite impressed.
Still, I must confess a personal mystery, that having spent most of my life around God centered folks, it is interesting to observe the good folks around me who build their family and weekly lives and friends and activities without any inclusion of God, faith, or religious practice. They seem to be doing OK, and most of them are a little uncomfortable with my attempts to bring God language into their lives. Not rude,just uncomfortable. It's just not what they think about.
It is my practice to just love these folks and trust God to create interest in spirituality, it does no good to stoke the fear of the fires of hell in this secular culture, they are good loving folks, we should love them and share with them and be genuine with this part of our American life. This good man was an inactive Catholic, a loving, caring, kind and fun loving retiree, who left a legacy that shouted to me a life well lived. I commended him to God his maker with hope and respect and was greatful to be God's gentle ambassador.
1 comment:
I think your approach to that situation is absolutely spot on and would hope many other pastors would have the compassion to approach it this way also.
Eden
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